Monday, July 9, 2012

Week Two in the M.T.Sizzle



June 5th, 2012
Sister Coco Mack
MTC, Provo, Utah

Nimen Hao!!!!

Ok. Here is something that I know. The concept of time is totally bizarre and weird and it is definitely distorted here in the MTC. It feels totally crazy to say that I have only been here for 2 weeks because about a bajillion things have happened and it feels like much much longer. At the same time I think whooooa there turbo, hang on a sec. I have been a missionary for 2 weeks! Pretend that is a question mark. Someone messed up this keyboard hardcore and the punctuation keys are extremely askew. My days are so full and I am so happy!

I would like to continue on by saying that being a missionary is very hard. And trying to teach lessons in Chinese is even harder. But I am strengthened every day by the enthusiastic and hilarious missionaries in my district, by my dear sweet companion, and of course the love I feel from family and friends pricking my heart as reminders when I need it the most. Quick side-note:I am so sorry that I speak so awkwardly. In addition to not speaking fluid or coherent Chinese, I am adding broken and uncomfortably awkward English to my long list of accomplishments! Just kidding! But seriously...it is becoming a bit of problem. I am hoping that that means my brain is in the process of switching to Chinese mode.

The exciting event of today is that we had a random fire drill while my companion and I were both in the shower. A lady came in and just told us to get outside as quickly as we could. We definitely should have taken it more seriously but since we had the feeling it was just a drill we took the time to get dressed and even brushed our hair. My companion had not washed off her face make up in the shower but I thought she had taken the time to put it on BEFORE we went outside and it made me laugh. Today has really been a magnificent P.Day. It came just in time because yesterday was actually the first day where I felt like....a hint of defeat.

We have a new investigator (he is actually our teacher but he is portraying a real investigator he encountered on his mission) and when we got in there to teach him he told us he only had 10 minutes though we were supposed to have like 25 or 30. We both kind of panicked and were trying to decide what to cut out on like the spur of the moment. Chen Dixiong..Brother Chen...has a lot of challenges in his life that are causing him a lot of sorrow. It was really tangible in the room even though we knew that it was just like a scenario. I was desperate to communicate with him and help him understand how much God loves him. I could feel it in that moment. But when I really needed my Chinese most it just was not there and I panicked more and stumbled even more. It was pretty rough. All of our other lessons up to this point have been a lot smoother. There were positive aspects to the lesson like I taught him how to pray and he said the closing prayer and he committed to read 2 Nephi 31 and pray about it and his prayer was very sincere and sweet at the end of the lesson...but I was still feeling very distraught. I was upset with myself for not communicating what I wanted to communicate. I was complaining like a big fat whiner to my companion.  One of the elders overheard me when I said that I just felt like a bad missionary and not a good teacher. He literally leapt up out of his seat and told me to stop talking. He went into this whole spiel about how amazing I am and blah blah blah...it was actually very sweet but it is embarrassing for me to write. The point is, it was really comforting. He always has such a positive attitude and he is always smiling and laughing which I just love. It is a strength to me and a reminder that I need to have more faith.

I was very humbled this week when in a teaching scenario in which we got to speak English, I totally bombed it. I was grateful to have the realization that teaching the gospel is a challenging thing for me, no matter what language. And I am so glad I get to be here for like...9 more weeks to work out the kinks.

Random MTC info....the MTC food is less than awesome. There are a few things they do REAL well....like muffins and pudding. But the salads are so BLAND compared to the luxurious 5 star ones that Flan made for me every day.

AHHHHHHHHHH running out of time! I am sorry I am so scatter-brained. There is never enough time to say all that I want to say, but that just means I will have more stories for when we are all together again. Something I just wanted to share in the line of my hard day yesterday....
I have a stronger and stronger testimony of Alma 26 verse 12 every single day. It says: Yea, I know that I am nothing, as to my strength I am weak, therefore I will not boast of myself, but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things, yea, behold, many mighty miracles we have wrought in this land, for which we will praise his name forever.

Is not that beautiful. I have seen many mighty miracles in my life since I have been in the MTC. I have seen it in my companion, who loves me and takes crazy good care of me. She is my best friend and a beautiful example every single day. I see it in my district who keeps me laughing when I feel like I might lose it. I see it in my progress with Chinese although it is slow...there is no way I could teach a lesson in Chinese about the restoration of the gospel without the Lords help.

I know God can make us mighty, we just have to let him.

I love you all so much, I pray for you every single day.
Much love,
Ke Jie Mei



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